The Howling of a Wolf, April 1988

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   Mark came in very wet, tired, and hungry, He rode his bike to work everyday, and there were times when the weather showed no mercy for bikers. We all sat down to supper, after saying grace. Tonight we were having a Hamburger Helper dinner, with a tossed salad. There was seldom desert, for this was truly a luxury. Only on special occasions were there such pleasures as these. We were always grateful for what we had, for we had known some hungry times in our young years of marriage. Although our family had suffered in some ways, we were richly blessed in others. We did not realize that in these hard and trying times, we were being molded and fashioned to do work which we had never done before. We all retired after prayers, hearing a gentle rain tapping at our bedroom window.

April 2nd, 1988

Holy Saturday 

   Mainly, this day is in preparation for the Easter events coming up tonight and tomorrow. We plan to go to the Easter Mass tonight at 8:00 P.M. and it will probably last well past midnight. Many young children are baptized at this special Mass, and our family is looking forward to this celebration. Joseph has his new Easter suit, a soft cream yellow, with a little bow tie to match. And of course, a new pair of white tennis shoes! Joseph enjoys trying his brand new Easter clothes on. "Joseph, my little man, you surely look sharp," I said. "Thank you, mommy," Joseph says with a snug hug. We are so excited, and I must watch carefully now since I have many of Joseph's Easter gifts hidden away under our bed. There is much peace today, and Joseph and I play a lot together with blocks and other fun things.

   Come noon, I prepare a lunch for little Joseph, and then I get my little man settled in to watch his favorite TV programs of Sesame Street and Mr. Rogers. I say a Rosary for my mother at this time, hoping and praying her condition is better. Seems no time at all before Mark gets in from work and makes his way to the shower.

   I quickly prepare a meal and then we all get dressed up in our best, and leave for Church. There are many cars parked all around the Church, so we will have to drive down a bit farther to find a parking spot. We are finally on our way, and in the entrance of the Church there are beautiful hanging drapes of pastel colors, many white lilies everywhere, and the wonderful smell of incense.

   The Church is dark, and everyone is carrying little white candles with them which they received in the back of the Church. The Church quickly fills with people, and in the air there seems to be a spirit of great anticipation and excitement. The little children are all beautifully dressed in their new Easter suits and dresses, with brightly-colored bows and ruffles. Some of the babes in arms are softly crying, but only to be quickly consoled with a bottle or a rhythmic motion of their mother.

   The celebration of the Mass begins with the singing of spirit-filled music and clapping hands. The Congregation turns toward the back of the Church and sees a great fire burning in a rounded container which is surrounded by many helping deacons, acolytes, and server boys. I remember thinking to myself, "I hope they are careful coming down those stairs with that tub of fire," which was beginning to really blaze. Msgr. Joseph James, pastor of St. John Neumann Parish, calls out to the Parish, "Jesus is the Light of the world. The world is dark and barren without Jesus. Let this fire be a reminder to us that Jesus is the Light, the Way, and the Truth." They slowly begin to descend down the stairs in back of the Church while everyone watched intently. Slowly, everyone's candles are lit and the Mass begins with: "In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit." A resounding "AMEN", comes forth.

   Mass continues with many prayers, and blessings. Many are baptized and new members are joined to the Catholic Faith. During the celebration, I see a vision appear far above the altar. It is JESUS! He is sitting on a throne, with a gold crown on His Head, holding a scepter in His Hand, I could see the wound in His Hand and His Side. The other hand seemed to rest in His Lap. He was slightly draped with a red robe edged in gold which hung over one Shoulder and fell to His Waist. A golden Cross was behind His Head. His Eyes were enormous. There was no Beard, and His expression was solemn with great authority and might.

   Please note that at the time I saw this vision I was unaware of the Mosaic of Jesus in the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception in Washington, D.C.

   It was much later after the events at St. John Neumann that I saw this picture of Jesus sent to me by mail from this Basilica in Washington.

   The vision stayed for sometime and then vanished. We were all so happy and the Church was alive with the Spirit of Christ. The sermon was wonderful, and so was the whole family Parish of St. John Neumann's. The sign of peace was given warmly and with such sincerity. Oh, how I love this Parish, and its people! After receiving Holy Communion, Mass was completed with praises and songs of exaltations and thanksgivings. All was beyond words; truly a blessed night.

   After departing from Church, we found Msgr. James surrounded by a crowd of people, wishing him a "Happy Easter!" I had to share with him my vision and what I had seen during the Easter Mass. Msgr. James smiled and said, "Praise God!" His face seemed to glow with joy. After expressing our best wishes for a "Happy Easter" to Msgr. James, and to our friends, we departed for home.

   I hurriedly dressed Joseph for bed, helped him brush his teeth, and tucked him in. Mark and I then said family prayers while Joseph was in a deep sleep. We were all very tired but felt wonderfully happy and light hearted. Mark made some coffee and stayed up with me awhile as I began to wrap some of Joseph's Easter gifts. Mark helped prepare Easter eggs by boiling and coloring, as I prepared to bake an Easter Bunny cake. With Mark's advice and help, the Easter cake turned out perfect. We used bright-colored jelly beans and a variety of colored icings. When these works were completed, Mark went off to bed after a quick embrace. After cleaning up the kitchen, I then said a Rosary. I was unable to sleep, for Easter is such an exciting time of the year! VIRGIN MARY - GATE OF HEAVEN

April 3rd, 1988

EASTER SUNDAY

   The sunshine is bright and Our Lord Jesus is Glorious! He is risen. ALLELUIA! ALLELUIA! ALLELUIA! Joseph's eyes are bright this morning, and we all are so jubilant! After our prayers and thanksgiving praises to Jesus, we share Easter cards, hugs and kisses. We then go to the kitchen to make some hot chocolate and prepare some breakfast. I pour Joseph his cocoa in his little mug and put some bright yellow marshmallow chicks in it.

   Mark smiles and says, "It's going to be a busy day,” as he gulps his cocoa down. Joseph is seated in his high chair and begins playing with the little marshmallow chicks in his mug when Mark brings out Easter gifts all beautifully wrapped. Joseph was so happy and we were altogether as a family. "Easter Bunny!" Joseph cried out in excitement, as he hastily unwrapped his gift.

   We spend the remaining day together in play and getting ready for an Easter egg hunt at the park. Joseph wore his little Easter suit and looked so cute. We have been coming to this park ever since Joseph was a baby. We had a wonderful fun time. After a long day of play at the park and hunting eggs, we came home to a spaghetti dinner which Mark had prepared for us. (Joseph and I love Mark’s cooking!) We have full intentions later this night to begin the distribution of the "fliers", which were designed and fashioned by the "VOICE", I had been hearing inwardly.

   It was this night that we were to deliver the remaining 85 fliers to public places throughout the city of Lubbock. It is late now, and I begin to prepare a bed in the back seat of the car for Joseph. Laying several sheets down, and a pillow, I go ahead and tend to Joseph's needs. After his bath, and brushing his teeth, we say prayers before our departure. We ask for the Lord's protection on our family as we go about His work. We also placed Rosaries around our necks, one hanging over each back door of the car, and one in Joseph's hand.

   Joseph is now settled down in his comfy back-seat bed, tucked in warm and safe. Joseph squeezes his little teddy bear, Duke and says, "Night, Night." After all doors are locked, and we are buckled in, we depart at twelve midnight. We have chosen to do this work at this hour to avoid crowds, and possible conflicts. Mark had been given a special grace to be able to climb in and out of the car so quickly and repeatedly. There was not a moment's rest as we counted down the fliers one by one. We had brought along special tape to secure the urgent messages for all to see and read. Mark applied them to public phone booths, laundromats, bus stops, public park restrooms, and public benches. All throughout town we drove; North, South, East, and West. We came to night clubs and drinking places where there was dancing. Many dens of iniquities.

   It was in a particular area of town where there were no street lights and many seemingly vacant buildings, when a frightening incident took place. It was very dark and I sensed an uneasiness . Just then the "VOICE" said in my ears, "Go back to the street. You missed a place. Follow my directions." Again I sensed an uneasiness come over me and Mark made the statement that he did not like this area we were in. "Let's leave this place." Mark said nervously. "Wait honey, I hear the "VOICE" telling me we missed a place." The "VOICE" again spoke to me saying, "Hear the music? Follow the sound you are hearing." This sound was leading us deeper into a winding road of gravel and darkness.

   The "VOICE" directed me to go up an unpaved road and to turn my lights out. I was told to stop the car but, not to turn the engine off. I was then told to personally get out of the car and deliver the flier. Mark had been doing this work all night, but this particular flier, I was to parcel out personally. Mark stood close at hand should I need help. I sensed there was something in this particular area which was an "ill will" feeling. "Evil ." "Satanic." The music was not music. The sounds were horrifying and there were voices mumbling and speaking things I did not understand. The sounds were not music but, beating drums. As I came close to this particular building which was so very secluded, the sounds and chants seemed to stop.

   I knew I had been seen. I felt I knew what the individuals inside were saying in this "hide-away building." "How did she find us here? Who is that?" The "VOICE" told me to place the flier on the glass door facing the people inside the dark building. I was told they could see out but, I could not see in. Yet I somehow felt I could see the faces and hear them whispering to one another. I just knew the people inside could see the flier. Jesus' face said it all. " C O N V E R T " I was then told drive out the alley way which was graveled. We both got back into the car as fast as possible. "Go quickly," the "VOICE" told me. I did as I was told, driving speedily away with my lights off. The "VOICE" did not speak anymore this night. After we reached a lighted street, I turned my headlights on and Mark and I breathed a sigh of relief. We returned home safely but, also knowing that these night missions would be dangerous. We hit the town hard in all public places to make people aware, the Lord Jesus will come again! VIRGIN MARY - HELP OF CHRISTIANS

Monday, April 4th, 1988

Rosary Night

   A good day; anticipating the night to come.  We have Rosary and Mark and myself give our first public testimonial. It was hard, but it built an inner confidence and strength within us. The Bishop Michael J. Sheehan who is (now presently) Archbishop of New Mexico, was here tonight. I remember how he so solemnly sat in the back of the Chapel with his note pad, taking notes and listening to our personal statements and feelings mixed with tears and some nervousness. I cried a bit but now that I look back... I don't care. If it helped someone, then good. "So let it be." Amen. We were tools and we were being used and hoped to be continually used for the glory of God! We wanted to lead people to Jesus.

   People were kind and generous to the Lord. All the donations were immediately given up to God for His works to be done. I remember one particular fellow, Mr. Phillip Thierry, who was so prompted by the Holy Spirit, that he told me to come to his office out at the Reece Air Force base (which is no longer in operation due to Bill Clinton who closed down the base during his term as president) the next day to collect his gift for the Lord's work. We discussed this privately and the arrangements were made for me to come out the next day.

Tuesday, April 5th, 1988

   An ad went out immediately, the next day April 5, 1988, "Lubbock Avalanche Journal" after a long drive to the Air Force base to cash a check: "God bless the kind soul who established a successful goal reached." The Message again... Jesus said, "Receive My graces and tell the whole world there will be happiness only through Me." Gospel of Matthew Chapter 6 - Verses 24-34. "C O N V E R T"

    The remainder of the donation gifts were spent on fliers and some gas to help distribute these fliers.  Being there at the printers, the Spirit told me to question the manager about his faith. I did as I was told. He was informed that the money he received was not from me but from God. That he was chosen to distribute information to the town of Lubbock and its’ citizens, to bring their attention to the fact that the Risen Lord Jesus Christ will come again. His business would receive blessings and his life would be blessed as well. I then questioned him, "Do you believe?" Hesitant at first, and somewhat taken aback, he said looking into my eyes... "Yes, I believe. God bless you," he said to me. "So be it," the reply came. If he thought I was crazy, then too, so be it. He is waiting on the Lord's further use of him! Amen and Alleluia! 

Wednesday, April 6th, 1988

   A day spent as with any family tending to chores as needed. Joseph had his lessons of ABC's and 123's etc. That night we distributed remaining fliers to neighbors willing to help pass out fliers. I remember there were several individuals more than willing to help out. I remember visiting with the Thierry family, the RockyMores, and so many other people.

   We set out to find the Constancio home and had much difficulty.  We rejoiced when we found their home. We went in to visit the Constancio's for the first time and I was very nervous. They were very kind people and most hospitable. Henry reminded me of such a joyful person full of laughter and wisdom of the gifts of the Holy Spirit. Mary Constancio was most gracious and lovely, with a constant warm smile that never seemed to leave her glowing face. They also had a visitor, named Rosie Lozada. She prophesied over me. In her message she gave the words about John the Baptist's favored daughter and that God was pleased. As Mark, Joseph and myself were gathered together and with the woman Rosie, Henry and Mary, I remembered asking myself, "Which favored daughter? There were three of us!" The message was unclear and gave me a great wonderment, but I left it in God's hands and said, "Let Thy will be done!" After we left there we hit remaining public places and a strip joint and bars. Mark was bold enough to distribute fliers in front of their faces! I was proud of him for that.

   We came home very tired. I put Joseph to bed and prayed the Rosary alone for my mom and family; the conversion of sinners, for Russia and for the souls in Purgatory. VIRGIN MARY - REFUGE OF SINNERS, HELP OF CHRISTIANS

Please Note: We had done some grocery shopping earlier and we bought some flowers for my mom.

Thursday, April 7th, 1988

   The ad in the paper comes out today! I am terribly anxious to see the fruits of God's Hand. "I want to see!" I dash over to the little store by our place, but it’s not open yet. (6:00 A.M.) Joseph is sleeping peacefully in bed. I try to busy myself by washing the dishes left the night before. I begin doing this chore trying to keep myself calm, but I am a nervous wreck!

    Suddenly I feel the "VOICE", or Spirit telling me to open my Bible to Luke. I continue to wash and scrub, trying to ignore the feeling which steadily grows stronger and stronger. Again I feel that I am to look up Luke in my Bible and read about Zachariah and John the Baptist. I stop doing dishes and did what I was told.

   I then felt the Lord SPEAK to me from these Bible verses. Zachariah's Canticle: Verse 75 - We should serve Him devoutly and through all our days be holy in His sight. Verse 76 - And you, O child, shall be called prophet of the Most High; For you shall go before the Lord to prepare straight paths for Him. Verse 77 - Giving his people a knowledge of salvation in freedom from their sins, Verse 78 - All this is the work of the kindness of our God; He, the Dayspring, shall visit us in His mercy, Verse 79 - To shine on those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the way of peace."

   I ponder on this reading and feel as if God Himself were over my very shoulders as I read these passages. It is beginning to dawn on me that I am hearing not just from a VOICE, but from God Himself! I now look up the feeling of Luke. (Luke 3:4-6, 9) "A herald's voice in the desert crying, 'Make ready the way of the Lord, clear Him a straight path.'" "Every valley shall be filled and every mountain and hill shall be leveled. The winding roads shall be made straight and the rough ways smooth and all mankind shall see the salvation of God. Even now the ax is laid to the root of the tree. Every tree that is not fruitful will be cut down and thrown into the fire."

   It is now one hour past. I return to the store again and this time they are opened! I purchase the A-J paper and hurry back to my place. I dash through the paper only to be dismayed. I can't find the ad! Where is it? Can't see it! Again... a run through, and do find it, but I was so very disappointed! Why? Because I expected the ad to be so outstanding and enormous. To my dismay it was placed in an area hard to see!  "Why God?"

   I was angered and felt disappointed. Other ad surrounding this notation of Christ drew away from it. This, to me, seemed to be the devil's work. He always wants to subtract from Christ. The saying in the Bible on how the road to Heaven is hard to travel and to reach; many take the easy route, the wrong way; the evil way! That is why so many in today's society is taking the route of life that is not right; all the temptations and delicacies of the world to entice us away from God and His Son, Jesus. This explained the ad. Anything to do with Christ will be bellowed out. It is only in our own hearts to choose the rights from the wrongs, to choose Jesus Christ. God is not forceful. Therefore He chose not to have any over-bearing ad. Yes, it was there, for those who choose to see it. (God gives us freedom to choose.)

   These thoughts did not come clear to me until later on in the evening with the help and sharing of our deacon's wife. In the meantime, my mind was closed to this and my eyes blinded. I only felt failure and disappointment. Now, the urgency of the letter I had written a few days earlier was becoming more fervent to my heart and mind. This letter was urgent and needed to be dealt with immediately. Only one day left! I had intentions of going to see my parents on Friday, April 8, 1988. My thoughts were especially on my mother who was very ill. I went to the Church with this urgent letter from the Blessed Virgin Mary .( March 30th directed by the VOICE to have a letter of approval from Msgr. James to invite surrounding communities to come to St. John Neumann Catholic Church to participate in the Holy Rosary.)

   I couldn't get anywhere. My efforts seemed blocked. Mike Slate and Agnes Klein were in the Chapel in prayer. I could not interrupt their prayers of devotion to Mary. I left, only to be deeply unhappy and feeling a great dismay. I went to Msgr.'s home, but no one was there. I went home feeling I was defeated.

   When I got home I was very tired and I heard the VOICE tell me to eat and to rest. Joseph was so very good through all of this. He came along silently and obediently. I was told to go to my room and sleep!! "Rest now".  I did. I slept a long time. When I awoke in the evening, I attempted once again my earlier duties left undone. This time I succeeded. (Through God's Will) Mark and I went to the Church together along with Joseph. We found that Leroy had the flu which his wife had related to us.

   The next step was to meet Mike Slate in the parking lot. He would be waiting there for us. While I was in the car, Mary, the Mother of God, revealed to me she was not happy about the Monday night Rosary turnouts. She wanted more people to know of her blessings on our small Parish; more devotional prayers so she could intercede for all her children and bring their fervent prayers to her Son Jesus Christ.

   When Mark, Joseph and myself reached the Church grounds, I could see Mike Slate and another man, B.S. sitting there at the outdoor patio table. Mike Slate began to read this letter written several days before. I was deeply relieved, but I had to release the emotional strain through tears. B.S. was present in our meeting with Diana, a friend made at the Monday night Rosary meetings.

   These people were present for a reason. I also revealed to Mike Slate and the others present, that earlier in the Chapel the Blessed Virgin revealed to me that in four months, (The ASSUMPTION), a miracle would occur in our parish. We can only wonder and wait to see what Our Blessed Lady will do here. VIRGIN MARY - VESSEL OF HOPE  We also smelled roses at this time as a sign and blessing to go on with the plans of travel to the communities north of us, Olton, Hart, Nazareth, and Dimmitt.

   I needed this reassurance, for I was beginning to wonder if all this was in my head. (Imagining things). After this fragrance of roses, I felt a renewed strength to carry on with the blessing with Mary's approval. I felt a great burden taken from my mind and heart.

   Plans were made that Mike Slate would come by in the morning to give me the go-ahead through Msgr.'s grace and letters written to encourage surrounding communities to come and pay patronage to the Blessed Virgin in our Church, at St. John Neumann's; also to encourage more prayers and devotion to the Blessed Virgin for the Marian Year. I also shared the newspaper ads with members. All ads came out on the seventh. (God's Day). The ad ran for one month in the Thrifty Nickel and in the morning and evening edition of the A-J paper in Lubbock.

   Needless to say, I was relieved, and after departing from this gathering of fellow parishioners, (distributing some fliers to Diana through Mike Slate), we went home. I wish to make a notation here that I also purchased two religious cards, fifteen cents each, one of Jesus and one of Mary. The family and I slept soundly and peacefully that night. VIRGIN MARY - QUEEN OF PEACE

Friday, April 8th, 1988

   Mark was off to work and I was up early waiting eagerly to receive Mike's message. 9:30 A.M. seemed to take forever to come! We had breakfast and I nervously awaited the passing hours while playing with Joseph. I decided to turn the night light on outside, so Mike could see it and our place better. Finally, Mike showed up! Mike didn't have time to knock on the door. It was opened before he reached it. The news was what we wanted to hear. The letters (invitations) were ready for me to pick up. I had to be at the Church office before 11:30 A.M.

   After my chores were done around the house and Joseph cared for, I hurried off to the Chapel with the flowers we had purchased a few days before. I wanted them blessed for my mom. I had placed the religious cards of Jesus and Mary in the flowers with loving messages from our family. (Mark, Theresa, and Joseph) When I got to the church office, I picked up the letters and had a few more things run off on the copier there. I asked if someone could give a blessing. The secretary said, "Everyone has left." Just then, I heard the Blessed Virgin Mary say, "Come to the Chapel, Theresa, and I will bless your flowers." "Yes Mary," I answered with no questions or doubts. I went to the car and got the flowers.

   Joseph and I entered the Chapel and placed the flowers at the front of the statue of the Blessed Virgin Mary. Suddenly, I felt a soft static electricity flowing all around me, yet driving to the main object, the flowers. The feeling was soft, yet powerful, and hard to explain it in words. When Mary was finished, I thanked her, straightened her area and left to do my orders. I remember how little Joseph and I ran up the Church stairs making haste to do the work for the Lord. I so carefully placed the beautifully large bloomed pink flowers in the back seat of the car. They almost seemed like gold.

   The rest of the day was spent waiting for Mark to come home. I played with Joseph some and explained to him how mommy would be leaving home for awhile to do some work for God, but that I would be back. I told Joseph that daddy would take care of him and they would play and have lots of fun, as all mothers would do. I gave orders for Joseph to be good while mom is away.

   When Mark got home from work, I left after goodbye kisses and hugs. We prayed for my safety and quick return. I drove off in a hurry, anxious to do God's will and to please Mary, the Mother of God. On the loop, I found myself soaring 70 mph then 65 mph down to 55 mph. I wanted to hurry, yet I was concerned of getting a speeding ticket. I started the routine questioning of, "What if this? What if that?" All at once I heard the "VOICE" intercede saying," A legion of angels is with you. One sits at each fender of your car and your path ahead of you is made clear." I became assured and continued the journey. I drove 70 mph when I finally got out of town. The car seemed to drive very smoothly. Angels do make a difference!

   I finally reached the town of Olton. The Spirit of the Lord seemed to go immediately to work, helping me locate and finding people who would aid me. I came upon a Spanish man walking down a street. I called to him and he came over to me. I asked him where the Catholic Church was. He started telling me and I asked if he was Catholic. He said, "Yes." I gave him some of the invitations and began speaking to him through the Holy Spirit. I begged for his cooperation and urged him to spread this news to his people. I left for the Olton Catholic Church and delivered the messages there, placing one on the altar and pulpit. I then left for Hart, Texas. 

    Hart Texas is where my parents always go grocery shopping and pick up their mail at the Hart Post Office. My brothers and I went to the Hart School district in our younger years but we always lived outside of Hart on our farm located in the Nazareth district.

   When I reached Hart, the Spirit told me to go to Martha's house, which was located next door by the Catholic Church. Martha has been a long-time friend of the family. When I entered into Martha's yard and knocked on her door, she answered with almost a shocked reaction. She did not know how to react towards me. I greeted her in the best way I knew how. I began to prophesy to her things I personally knew nothing about. I told her I was not drunk nor was I on drugs. Martha verified the accuracy of the prophecies I gave. She was also told to spread the good news of Jesus coming back! After a short visit, I headed for Nazareth and our farm.

   As I drove away, I sensed that Martha did not believe the things I had shared with her, and I was certain she thought me a nut. When I got into the small town of Nazareth, there was no one home at the Priest's house. I went around the back to the Nuns' Chapel area. There I was met by a woman who was in her habit. She had the door locked, but she unlocked it only to prevent my entering. I spoke then in the Spirit, "Oh, fair Nazareth, do not deny me again." I felt for certain this statement was directly from Our Lord Jesus Christ. Again, the Spirit prompted me to say, "Dare you bar the entrance of the Blessed Mother's message?" There was a shocked look on the face of the woman. The door opened easily then without her hesitant reaction as earlier. I entered hastily and blurted out the message that the Mother of God was visiting St. John Neumann's Catholic Church in Lubbock. I must have seemed frantic and very excited. I then realized that I had not genuflected before Our Lord in the Tabernacle. After doing this with reverence to the Lord, I went back to the pews where the women were seated. They had been saying the Rosary I began my message. By now I had reached a tiring point.

   The women began to question me: "Who are you? Where are you from?" They were troubled for me because I was crying and seemed anxious. They told me to be at peace, for the Lord is peace. They urged me to calm down and tell them all that I was to share. They were relieved to find out that I was a daughter to one of the old families of the community. "OHHHHHH," they would say. "Yes," they would continue to say. I told them it pleases the Mother of God that they continued to pray the Rosary devoutly. I told them we were battling for souls, and that we should pray more! Mary is not happy! She wants more prayers! Devotional souls are needed. Make more time for Mary, so she may be able to intercede and pray for us to her Son, Jesus! The Spirit said, "Do not refuse Me, oh fair town of Nazareth, as you had done so long ago." Their faces which seemed to be left without words, listened in great concern. Only a faithful few and aged, they will be blessed for remaining faithful. I gave other printed information (testimonials from Parish members), and newspaper clippings from our Catholic paper here in Lubbock. They told me to be calm and not afraid. I cannot explain the actions that came across me, but the message became clear. More prayers! They said they would call together a CYO meeting and have the copies run off for their Church. They told me the copies would be out for their parish family of Nazareth that coming Sunday.

   I felt relieved after I left, but had one more town to do, Dimmitt, Texas. I left for that town and drove at a more calmer pace, but still fast enough for a ticket! When I got to the Church, the Spirit said, "That man in his red pickup is waiting for you." I walked up to him and he had a very pleasant face. He could not speak a word of English; yet the Spirit intervened.

   We searched high and low together for the Padre. The priest was not to be found. We then went into the Dimmitt Catholic Church. The Spirit, (VOICE) said to go to the two women praying at the altar. I was excited and anxious. I almost interrupted their prayers, but the Spirit said, "Wait, respect is needed here for their prayers and the altar! Mind yourself, Theresa."

I sat back waiting impatiently. Soon their prayers were finished. I greeted them, "¡hola!". I was so excited, I began to prophesy to them. They looked shocked with suspicion. Caution was in their eyes.

   I told them how they were favored by God to hear this good news brought before them, that the Lord Jesus was coming back again! I also told them how Mary, the Mother of God, wanted more devotional prayers. I had come a long way to bring them this news. They translated all that I said to the young man, Alfredo, who could speak no English. Great joy came over their faces and yet, it seemed, some doubt. Finally, one of the ladies said, "I believe you." Her mother had died a month ago and before her death, the Sacred and Immaculate Hearts of Jesus and Mary were shown to her in a mirror on the wall of their home. That day had been foretold that someone would come to bring news from the Lord; that there should be more prayers and patronage to Mary the Mother of Our Lord Jesus.

   I distributed much literature to them, and included some Medjugorje papers. They had no knowledge of Medjugorje at all.   After visiting there, a great Spirit came over me to rejoice in the Church. I began to cry out "Alleluia" and "praise to Jesus Christ Our Lord and King." I bowed to the Blessed Virgin's statue where I thought I spied a slight smile. (Imagining?) I left and went off to the farm in Nazareth where my parents lived.

   On my way to the farm, I began to sing praises to God. Songs of rhythm and beauty. Each town, I called by name, and sang with all my heart. I don't know why I did this; it was just supposed to happen! As I drove along the countryside, the "VOICE", (Spirit) said, "Look, over in the fields, the Lord God is walking with you!" I looked over to the west and saw what the Spirit revealed to me. God was walking upon His earth. All around Him was a great cloud of dust, swirling about Him with every step He took. I never saw a cloud look anything like it. It was as if it was hiding the great Being behind itself!

   My mouth opened and I began to sing, "My eyes may not see the Glory of Thee, for if I should spy upon Thee, my breath will be taken from me and I shall die." I was driving 70 mph and yet God was with me all the way! I could see the strides taken. They were like the steps of a giant. Each step was surrounded by whirls of miniature dust storms or tornadoes. I could see Him! He was walking on His earth, His creation, a leisurely walk, a Kingly walk; yet my eyes were veiled not to see His intimate features, no eyes, nose, or any of these things, but a form walking, moving and being shielded, camouflaged by the dust which swelled up around Him. I knew it was God. How powerful, wonderful, and frightening! I continually praised His Name till I reached the farm. When I drove up in front of the farm house, my sister came out to greet me. My sister had been staying with my mother trying to nurse her back to health.

   My mother was not herself, and all the family seemed a bit 'standoffish.' I presented the flowers to my mother and said, "Mom, these flowers are from Mary, the Blessed Virgin. You are supposed to keep them by you at all times. Breathe in their fragrance. If you are in the bathroom, bring them with you. At night, when you sleep, keep them by your bed, so that you may receive Mary's blessings of health and restoration." VIRGIN MARY - HEALTH OF THE SICK

   At this time, mom and my sister were quiet and didn't say too much; yet they listened as if they were truly concerned. I would stay for supper although I wasn't really hungry. The table was set and we were waiting for Pa Pete to come in from the fields. We heard him coming in the back door. His greeting, always good to my ears, and a welcoming smile, was always special. My father mentioned he came in early because he had seen a strange cloud formation to the northwest. I immediately knew he was seeing the Lord too, at the same time I was seeing Him earlier on my drive to the farm. Pa Pete did not realize what he was really seeing. After a short visit, and a small supper (salad), I was ready to head back home. My parents refilled the car with gas and mom was in the car with me. She wanted to ride with me. I sensed she was concerned for me. I told my mom, "Please don't be upset with the things I say or do. I'm only doing what God has told me to do. I fear the Lord, and I want to try my best to do as He says. I don't understand the things that have happened here, but always, I will treasure them in my heart. All that I have is God's". I continued to tell my mother, "If He should choose to take it away from me, it is His to take. His will shall be done. I mustn't question it, for God knows all." After this, there was a silent uncertain departure from us a light embrace, and I was on my way.

   It was dark now and it began to rain. I thought in my journey back I heard the "VOICE," (Spirit) reveal to me that it was finished with me. My duties are finished. So be it. I got home after dropping some invitations off at Spade, Anton, and Shallowater. (Medjugorje papers too).  Arrived home very tired.

   Please don't think of me as anyone special, folks. (I am far from it). When I got home, I became angry because things were not done (chores) etc. that I had asked to be done. I became angry and exploded. Yes, I am very ashamed of myself after personally witnessing and experiencing all that I did through God's gracious kindness and blessings. Why did I do what I did and get angry? I ask the same question. I am only human and I am a sinner! Like Msgr. Joe James said, "Why does Jesus use frail human beings to preach His word today, and not angels?" Well, I'm certainly not an angel, but I give thanks for being a "tool" for God. Jesus chose to form a body, His body, from sinners who needed Him (JESUS) and each other! We would learn to obey, serve, forgive, and love one another. I thank God for my family. VIRGIN MARY - QUEEN OF CONFESSORS

Saturday, April 9th, 1988

   Today, I am very tired and glad to be home with my baby. Seems like I have been away from my family forever. I went to confession to confess my grievous faults against God. I shared all the wonders with Msgr. Joe James. After his blessing and his peace upon me, (I always feel better after seeing and speaking with Msgr. Joe James), I went to evening Mass with Joseph and then we went home. Now, things seem still. Calm. No VOICE in my ear. Silence. Is it good?

Sunday, April 10th, 1988

   It is Sunday morning, and very beautiful. The day is spent in rest and remembering all that has happened. Peace is in our family. Evening comes, and time is spent straightening up the house and doing dishes etc. I finished everything but the floors, which had to be swept. The Blessed Virgin is here in our apartment!!!! I smell the fragrance of her roses strongly. I melt to the floor. "Is that you, Mary?" My heart is in my throat with small fear. I immediately get the prayer missal and promise her prayers and devotion. I quickly sweep the floor and mop. I light the candles and do the fifteen decades in prayer for the remission of sinners, for Russia and for the poor souls in Purgatory, for all family members, near and far, for the children of this world, the aborted, abandoned, abducted, abused, molested, and murdered, for those less fortunate and in sorrow, for the ill of mind and body, for my friend, Gene Irlbeck in Happy, Texas and for all those not mentioned here. I spend the night into morning hours in prayer. The roses are in my Rosary and lingers all through the house as I pray. Mark, smells them too! I finally retire to bed after thanking Mary for her fragrance of roses and her intercessions.

                                                                                           Monday, April 11th, 1988

   This morning, there is no fragrance of roses. Mark said he smelled them early before he left for his work. There is no more here to tell my friends. I can only feel that Mary lingered here as a way of saying, "Goodbye, "to me and my family. Joseph said he saw her, (Mary), in our apartment house. I don't doubt that she could have been telling little Joseph "Goodbye," in her own way. All I know is that we have been blessed by all these experiences and that it was a wondrous thing to be a part of God's plans. We believe His plans are for all of us, in small or large ways. He, (God) loves each one of us so much. Look at all He strives at to bring our attentions to Him and His Son, Jesus Christ. If it is through frail human beings or the apparitions of the Blessed Virgin Mary, it is all for a Divine reason and purpose, "Fighting for souls. Fighting for eternal life." Continue to pray, fast, and tithe to God. He will not let you down or go unaided. This is Rosary Night. Many are in the Chapel. Mr. Irlbeck has come over eighty miles away to pray and give homage to the Blessed Virgin Mary. He has obeyed her wishes and Gene will be blessed because of it. So will all the others who are faithful and with hope. A word of tithing. It truly works. Our personal needs have been met due to tithing. Our freezer is low and a friend brings us many steaks, roasts, hamburger meat, etc. Our rent was paid for the month of April because of tithing. Our tax return also comes in. This allows us to open a savings. Tithing does work. Trust in God, for He sees your needs and will meet them if you are but mindful of Him.

Monday, April 11th, 1988

Second Monday of Easter                                                                                        Feast of Saint Stanislaus

Monday Messages from Mother Mary:

   (During the 15 Decades of the Rosary) My dearly beloved children, I have a smile on my face to see so many of you together. Please, my children, remember to smile...for this is the smile of Jesus - which brings comfort, which brings hope and joy to those who have none.

   I have been sent to you to speak to you - to each one of you - to each of your hearts. So, listen! Listen! I have a message for each one of you. Listen to your hearts, for I am speaking through my heart. My heart says, "Love one another, forgive one another, pray for one another, fast for one another."

   I love you all so much that our Father in heaven has allowed me to visit you to pray and intercede for you in a special way. A way in which only I can, through the grace of my son, Jesus. Hold my son at your right arm, just as he sits at the right hand of our Father. For he alone is the holy one, he alone had died so that you may see the kingdom and be with us.

   Forgive, my children, forgive. For no faster can you reach my son's ears. My dear children...so beautiful, so holy. For when you say "yes" to forgiveness...then you all can be holy as I am holy. No greater love can you offer one another than through repentance. Through forgiveness.

   It would please me, my children, if you could enjoy the entire rosary with me. For my heart rejoices when I hear the unity of prayer...for I know you are praying to become closer to my son. And no greater joy is there than that.

   Thank you, children, for being here. For taking this time to believe. Continue to pray, my children, for this parish - for your parish - that God's glory may be shown, that his salvation may be encountered by all who come, by all who hear.

   Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations. Remember...I am with you!

   (During the Sorrowful Mysteries) My children - all of those who are sorrowful and without hope - know that your prayers have been heard. For you have done what I called you to do. Rejoice, for our Lord's mercy is great!

   Thank you, my children, for your ears...for your hearts. For they are fragile, but strong with my son's strength. So breathe your last breath of sorrow. And breathe with your praises in your heart.

Mary Constancio, messenger

Please Note: Mary Constancio has gone to Washington, D.C. to help lead healing weekends in two parishes there. She indicated that I, Theresa Werner (now Fleischman) would receive the Rosary message in her stead. I recall that particular moment in almost a state of disbelief. I found myself asking, "Why me?" Mary Constancio must have made a mistake and meant someone else. I do remember many glances at that moment when Mary Constancio made her announcement. The crowd accepted Mary's word, for it was good as gold. I did not argue or try to back out, but I do remember saying to Mary Constancio, "What if the Blessed Mother does not give me a message?" Mary's face glowed and there seemed to be no hesitation nor regret in her words. "Yes, Theresa, you are the one who will take my place while I am away."

   Although I tried not to show my fear and concern in receiving a message, I tried to go on through the rest of the week calmly and in prayer. There was little covered in my diary this week, due to much prayer and tending to family. I do wish to state that Friday, April 15th, 1988, my mother was healed! A miracle in itself. Life was back in her eyes and her face glowed! Thank you Mary, Mother of God! Thank you, dear God!

P.S. Mother said the flowers dried up completely in just a few days.

Sunday, April 17th, 1988

   "Thank you Lord God for all you have shown us, revealed to us, but most of all, thank you God for Your Divine love and concern for all your children. Through the aid of the Blessed Virgin Mary, may we always strive for a sinless life that we may all be with Jesus Christ in Heaven."

Monday, April 18th, 1988

   Gene came down from Happy, Texas. We all go to Monday Rosary. I am very concerned if I will be able to relate a message from the Blessed Virgin Mary. I have fasted all day Sunday (4-17-88) in hopes and in prayer that Mary and God will be pleased.

   When we are in the five Joyful Mysteries, I begin to hear a voice. On the third Joyful Mystery, (The Nativity), Mary the Mother of God, begins to speak. My hand begins to write down her message with a quick dashing of legible shakes. I am afraid and begin to cry. My emotions have never been hidden well. Mary's message is clear: "PRAY! Continue to pray and know that God is with all of us!"

   Mike Slate was kneeling beside me. I had been hesitant in writing down the message at first. It was here that I mentioned to Mike that he might get a message as well. Mike looked at me strangely, but remained still and silent. After I had finished receiving the message from the Mother of God, I asked Mike if he felt anything or sensed anything. Mike stated that he felt Mary was giving him the same message too. He read the message on the sheet and shook his head and said that he got the same thing in his head. I feel that Mike Slate was there for me as a confirmation.

Monday, April 18th, 1988

Third Monday of Easter

Monday Messages from Mother Mary:

   (During the Fifteen Decades of the Rosary) My dear children, it moves me deeply to see the faithful gather before me...to give me homage so that I may bless them and bring them blessings from my son, Jesus Christ.

   My dear children, continue your prayers, your love, your faithfulness unto me. Many blessings will be bestowed onto those who continue their faithfulness and hope. Know that my love goes with you unto all times of the earth. Your heavenly Father knows of all your needs and he shall bring to pass all that is to be.

   Go in my love, my dear ones, always. My heart goes out to those in grief. Know that I will be with you in all your times of need...as in my time of grief, when my son was crucified. My heart was grieved deeply. So it is with those lost and seeking. Continue to pray for those lost and searching.

Continue your fervent prayers for all the world and for all its people.

Theresa Fleischman, messenger

Please Note: David and Theresa Garcia are in Washington, D.C. for the months of March and April because of his job. While there, two parishes have asked for a healing weekend. They paid the way for three more team members to come to Washington from Lubbock, Texas. Mr. and Mrs. Henry Constancio and Ms.Wynn went on this mission. Mrs. Constancio (Mary) felt that Our Lady would give us a message on Monday through Theresa Werner (now Fleischman) while they were in Washington. The message was given and received as you previously read. Mary Constancio's message was received in Washington D.C. as you will now read:

Monday Messages from Mother Mary:

   (During the Fifteen Decades of the Rosary in Washington,D.C.) My children, you are apostles of my church. Blessed are you who respond to our Father's call. Blessed are you who respond when you are called. Blessed are you who accept without seeing, for you shall see the glory of God.

   Sons of our Father, you shall be made worthy of the promises of Christ. There is much work to do. Do not despair, for all the path has been carved and your names have been installed in the palm of our Father's hand. Do not be surprised when you are called, for our Father chooses carefully. He chooses...and he has chosen your church to be the mold. Love shall be the center of the mold. Love shall prevail above all else...for love casts out all fear, love casts out all that does not belong to this church. For my son alone is the holy one. For my son has destined your nation - diocese - to be holy as he is holy.

Peace be with you! Thank you, my children, for being here tonight.

Mary Constancio, messenger

   Thank You, Lord for allowing me to be a tool for Your Divine use. For however long it may be. Let Your will be done!

Tuesday, April 19th, 1988

   This day is calm and I have been made aware to work and make ready another flier for God. The "VOICE" (which now I believe is the voice of God) said this flier should be a bright yellow. The reading from the Bible is from Luke 3:9 "R E P E N T" This is the message with our beloved Lord's picture at the top of the flier. There was not the hectic pace in preparing this message as was before. A more calm, subtle approach.

Wednesday, April 20th, 1988 

    "Happy birthday, Mark! We love you." Mark is thirty-seven. This is also a busy day for the Lord! We withdrew fifty dollars from the bank to give as a tithe to God and with the balance had five hundred fliers made up. We were told by the "VOICE" (Spirit of God) to make ready for a very long, busy night. We took Joseph to the movie to see "The Fox and the Hound." This was a chance to relax some before our work began. Joseph enjoyed himself immensely. After the movie, we started to work. It was around 10:30 P.M.

   Please Note: Earlier this day, Msgr. Joe James was told of our plans and fliers were distributed to some members of the Parish. We participated in the Rosary at the Chapel at St. John Neumann's.

   Now off we go after preparing a bed in the back seat of our white "78" Chevy, Impala for Joseph. Sound asleep, and all was ready! We were eager to get started! We put our Rosaries around our necks and blessed ourselves with Holy Water. Four-way stop signs, public phones, public parks, bus stops, and public restrooms were our targets all over the town. We ran into an incident on 34th Street (This is the "Drag") for the teens of the town.

   A black Trans Am spied Mark putting up a message flier. I guess these kids didn't like what they saw, so they began a hot pursuit after us. Mark yelled at me to go on, but I would not leave him. I waited for him to run back to the car. Mark ran to the car quickly and got in, then I took off as fast as I could. It was like a chase scene in a 007 movie.

   This was not a funny situation. These individuals were very serious and we ran for our very lives. I am not the hottest drag racer; that was never my bag nor cup of tea. Most of all, Mark and I feared for Joseph's safety. We quickly turned down a residential neighborhood and turned into someone's driveway. I turned off the headlights and the engine of the car. Mark and I laid down in our seats and shook in our shoes. I remember saying, "Dear God, please help us; protect us, Mary!" We could hear the car coming nearer and my heart felt like it went into my throat. We could hear the car slowing down. We knew they were looking for us. Just then we heard the racing engine, and spinning wheels go racing by as if in a rage for its missing prey. It raced past several times in an attempt to locate us.

We stayed in this area for some time.

   When it seemed that the pursuers had disappeared, we decided it was safe to go on. We stopped at a 7-11 store and got a cup of coffee. Mark reported the incident to the manager of the store. The manager informed Mark that there have been many reports and complaints about a black Trans Am around the neighborhood. He told Mark that he would call the police and tell them. Although I was not a coffee drinker, I had a cup along with Mark, but I scalded my tongue.

   The night was now late but we went on to complete the delivery of the remaining fliers. Mark showed an indescribable strength in continuing the "in and out" routine of the car and of climbing to high places, (poles, etc.) to place fliers. At long last, we were finished. We had distributed two hundred fliers and were finished around 6:15 in the morning. We were tired, and went home to rest.

 Friday, April 22nd, 1988

   I went to the Nazareth House on 32nd Street to purchase a Scapular for Mark and myself. Seems this has been strongly on my mind. I don't know why. Before we leave, Joseph says, "What is that smell mommy?" (I smell nothing, although I'm busy sniffing.) Joseph says it smells like roses: "Mary, mommy? Mary here ", he said. So be it! I believe! "Yes Joseph, I believe Mary is here just for you honey," I replied. We hurry off. No one is home at the Nazareth House, but we return much later that same evening to purchase two Scapulars, a red finger Rosary for Joseph, two bottles of Holy Water, and a picture of the Sacred Heart of Jesus and His Mother Mary.

Saturday, April 23rd, 1988

   Mark and I smell a faint fragrance of roses. We say the Rosary.

 Sunday, April 24th, 1988

   Emotions are high again. Crying. Why? Deep thoughts of you, Blessed Virgin Mary and of life itself. Reading in my Bible. A Rosary is said.

Monday, April 25th, 1988

   I am fasting this day and concerned about receiving a message from Mary, Virgin Mother. I am devoting morning prayers to Saint Joseph for Mark to receive a job at the hospital. Gave message from Mary tonight. Very afraid and emotional.

Please Note: I have broken out in shingles (a nerve disorder) Our friend from Happy, Texas said he smelled roses tonight!

Monday, April 25th, 1988

Fourth Monday of Easter

Feast of Saint Mark

Message:
    My beloved children, My Heart calls to those in need. My Heart goes out to those who are lost and searching. Continue your prayers. Continue your hopes in Me and your Heavenly Father. He brings all to pass that is to be.

   Why, why do you continue to disbelieve? Where is your faith? How can I bring unto you blessings from above when here I find so few among you? My dear little ones, continue to pray and bring others with you! You faithful few, how pleased I am with thee. Your prayers shall be answered. Your blessings will be added up and stored in the Everlasting Father.

   Only through My Son shall you find peace in your lives and in all your undertakings. Be at peace, My children, and fear not the evil one. Go in My Love and in My Peace.

Theresa Fleischman, messenger

Wednesday, April 27th, 1988

   Mark said he smelled roses while working in the kitchen bakery at the cafeteria! We said the Rosary that night.

Thursday April 28th, 1988

   Emotions running high again. It's 12:30 P.M. when it hits me! (Praise you, Father) Jesus speaks to me mentioning to me: "Take My yoke upon your shoulders, for it is light." At first it didn't sink in. Jesus speaks to me again, "Take My yoke upon your shoulders, for it is light." I went to Jesus' picture in the bedroom and looked into His Eyes! "Yes Lord," I prayed. I hurried to the kitchen with my Bible. I said to myself, "Where is this reading?" I open the Bible, but before my eyes, the pages fell to the exact reading that Jesus was telling me! Matthew 11:28-30 I was very happy to receive the message and I gave thanks!

   I copied the Chapter and Verses down. I want to do more. I took a piece of paper and wrote a list of all I was supposed to do. I dropped off the address book at the Thierry's house. Then I went to visit Mary Constancio. There we talked about many things. Mary told me "the Blessed Virgin does not want me to be afraid." We compared the messages we received and they were so similar. We both discover that Mary wants all of us to pray for our fellow men, for all people. (This message also seemed to be given the 18th of April, 1988.) There will be a miracle, but people must have more faith and devotion.

   It was revealed to myself (Theresa) on April the 7th and then again  on April the 28th with Mary Constancio that (The Blessed Virgin Mary), will make an apparition of herself to "many". Our church (St. John Neumann) will be a refuge for "many", a safe place to come for prayer, love and help from people being nurtured by God. We are to devote prayers to the Sacred Heart of Jesus along with our rosaries on Mondays. We must be a forgiving people and loving toward our fellow man, more devotional prayers to the Blessed Virgin Mary, to the Sacred Heart of Jesus and prayers for the souls in Purgatory and the world!

Please Note: Some individuals whom I mention in this diary will not be given full names in order to protect their identity.

   Our Holy Mother is in sorrow for all the "hurts" we cause her and her, Son Jesus Christ. Truly, more prayers are asked from all of us! Mary Constancio is troubled and concerned over these most urgent messages, and is seeking more deeply the prayers the Blessed Virgin Mary has asked from us all. After our visit, I left for the hospital to see Sister A.B. in the Pastoral Care Department. She had to run, but I was told to drop in on her and let her know we were thinking of her. Our visit will be at a later date.

Please Note: (Joseph was always with me on all these business errands, visiting, or any mission work.)

   When Mark came in later this evening we left for the farm. We drove out there to bless my mom's house because it was told to me that my mother was ill and "Spirits of Illness" were dwelling there. We got there after 8 P.M. My mother came outside upset that we had come. She had another illness in her chest and stomach. The Blessed Virgin Mary told me two weeks ago that my mom's home needed blessing, and that a picture of Jesus' Sacred Heart and Mary's Immaculate Heart needed to be put up in my mother's home. We did just that. With all my mom's doubts, she allowed us to obey Mary's requests. We put a picture of Jesus and Mary up.

   We blessed my mom's home which veiled a "heavy" atmosphere. We blessed it, declaring, "Demons of illness, depart in the Name of the Father, and of the Son, Jesus Christ, and in the Name of the Holy Spirit". The heaviness seemed to leave immediately!! A light feeling of joy came over all of us and the interior of mom's home. After a very short visit, we departed to go back to Lubbock. It was going on toward 11 o'clock.

   We stopped at the Chapel before we went home. There we separately prayed in silence. (Mark, myself, and Joseph) I prayed for Mark and his hope in finding a new job, for financial help, and I gave thanks for a safe journey and all the intercessions. Mark prayed for a sign from Mary. Just then before us, the lilies moved as if they were touched harshly and yet gently! We knew it was Mary. We could sense her presence. I felt the Virgin Mary was saying to my mind that she was pleased with what we did. She asked me to turn around. Asking me three times, I hesitated. Finally, I turned but, saw nothing. I became nervous and knew I must try very hard to work on this problem of fear that I have. We went home and said a Family Rosary together.

Friday, April 29th, 1988

We went to see the Constancio family, Henry and Mary. We talked of many things, while Joseph played with their pet dog, Chico. We talked about Jesus, work, faith, and messages from the Lord. We had prayer together and Mary Constancio said we were asked from Jesus to be His disciples.

Please continue reading on the next page, "Howling Wolf, May 1988"